Mysterious forces are the primary cause of shoes coming untied. Not, of course, to be confused with the force used by Luke Skywalker or Yoda. That’s something altogether different.
OK, while writing this I made a very serious discovery. I am magnetic. I apparently attract clutter. I am a clutter magnet. This room wasn’t like this until I got here.
I don’t think you’re taking this seriously. I mean it, look around. I am surrounded. Everything has moved in closer to me. I’m lucky my elbows have the amount of space they have. I need a stuff exorcist.
When throwing stuff
away, I have to ask myself, where is away? It must be a place, but where is it on the
map?
“Oh, the Parkers…
they moved away.”
Yes, but where did
they go? Can you show me?
“Well… I’m not really
sure. I just know they’re not around
here anymore.”
Good, that’s where I
want all of this stuff to go. Someplace
not around here.
“Some things you just
can’t get rid of. Not sure why. They seem to have some sort of force.”
Don’t tell me that.
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