Career Day

 

A person of interest was never on their list of possibilities.

An oversight?  Perhaps.

 

Forger.  A tributary sprouting from the advanced calligraphy course.

 

Embezzle Your Way to Retirement.  Prerequisite; Forgery 101 and 102. Accounting Basics & Juggling.

 

Politics: Spin Class, Posing and Glad-handing, Truth Avoidance for Beginners, and Syntax Made Confusing.

 

Hack Your Way to Riches: Using area codes to your advantage.  Your Telephone Presence.  Seniors – Using their poor vision and bad hearing for fun and profit.

 

Arsonist: (Instructor has not yet been released)

 

 

 

Principal’s Welcome Letter

(From the Desk of Dr. Plimpton W. Greeble, Interim Principal, Acting Deputy of Interim Affairs)

Dear Students, Families, and Concerned Bystanders,

Welcome to another inspiring Career Day at Greeble Institute for the Creatively Misguided, where we believe every child deserves a future — even if that future is best described as “legally inadvisable.”

This year’s catalog reflects our commitment to real‑world readiness. While other schools cling to outdated notions like “ethics,” “integrity,” and “not setting things on fire,” we prepare our students for the world as it actually is.

Our Forgery Program continues to flourish, thanks to the generous donation of a vintage check‑signing machine from an unnamed local bank. The Embezzlement Track has doubled in enrollment since we added beanbag chairs and a course called Retirement: Why Wait? Meanwhile, our Political Sciences Department remains a beacon of confusion, producing graduates who can speak for thirty uninterrupted minutes without conveying a single fact.

We are especially proud of our Hack Your Way to Riches initiative, which teaches students to use area codes strategically — a skill that has already resulted in three internships and one ongoing investigation. And of course, our Arsonist Program remains on hiatus until the instructor is released, though we continue to receive postcards from him, each one singed around the edges.

Please enjoy today’s presentations, and remember: Every career begins with a spark. Some sparks are just… more literal than others.

Warm regards, Dr. Plimpton W. Greeble Interim Principal Greeble Institute for the Creatively Misguided.

 

 

ZC