Odd but True

 

If a Cell Phone Rings in the Forest,

and there is no one there to answer it…

 

            Saturday morning we were on our way to West Bloomfield to shop at Hillers, a store that through great effort and determination on our part we eventually discovered sells Armenian bread.  I had been searching for this bread for some time only to keep getting lead to Arabic or Greek stores carrying a feeble facsimile. 

 

        Claudia was driving in order to avoid an incessant number of questions. “Which way now?  Do I turn here?  What do I do when we get to the light?”  Those of you who know me understand that I was born without a North arrow.  I have absolutely no sense of direction.  But that isn’t what I came to talk to you about today.  On our way down the road I noticed a vehicle I hadn’t seen before.  This being Detroit, I wasn’t surprised, but this vehicle caught my attention.  I even said to Claudia at the time, “Look at this, it’s a Bandwagon.”   Made by Chrysler, and truly a rushed-to-market vehicle, for it was touted as a Low-Carb Van.  The Bandwagon seemed to satisfy all of America’s needs.  There was room enough for the 2.3 children, the 73 cu. ft. of cargo space, and the flip-down, surround sound Panavision, Technicolor wide screen, with the dual cup-holder back seat.  But of course, it was the low carb that was key.

        It was somewhere in West Bloomfield, close to the border of Farmington Hills, we happened to notice yet another marvel.  (I feel at this point that I should mention, for those readers of these posts not living here in Michigan, that even though these communities call themselves, “The Hills,” Michigan hasn’t a single goose bump.  A person could, if fit enough, and lacking the propensity for hooks, hurl a bowling ball across the entire state without a problem. And, if not passing through Detroit, wouldn’t hit a single gutter).

        No, the marvel I wish to tell you about is the Redwood.  Yes, you heard me right.  There, in the midst of West Bloomfield, Michigan stands an extremely tall Redwood tree.

      We did a double take, and then another.  Which I guess would be a quadruple take.  We were flummoxed.  Here was a tree that towered way beyond the mighty Oak.  It reached far beyond the Elm or Ash.  In fact, this tree had no equal.  I believe it was this particular attribute that caused us to consider this to be a freak of nature.  Its trunk was smooth as concrete, and its branches as uniform and symmetrical as a twin in front of a mirror.

        OK, I can tell you are getting antsy. This is way too much to read, and you want me to cut to the chase.  Here it is.  We walked into Trader Joes, a Cool-Dude Market, specializing in quality foods and unique items.  Customer service is a priority with Trader Joe’s, and so every employee we encountered asked how we were doing?  Were we finding everything OK?  Were we happy?  Were we having a nice day, and had we seen the new Bandwagon by Chrysler? 

        Well, one employee who tossed one of these questions at us found himself being hit with a question in return.  “What the Hell is that thing outside?  Is it a tree?  Is it an apparition?   Just what were we looking at?

        The one person in the entire world we chose to ask was the father of the little girl who thought of the idea.  This guy’s kid had an idea that the cell phone company who needed to put up a tower in the community should be made to make it look like a tree. She wrote to the mayor, who then called her at home, and eventually the mayor got it done. And so that was what we were seeing.  It was a cell phone tower, made to look like a tree.  An incredibly large tree, but nonetheless, a tree. 

    No, I’m not giving you some pep talk about how the power of one can accomplish the impossible, I’m just letting you know that yes, we found the Armenian bread.

 

See?

 

I knew you’d be excited.