The Five Second Rule

 

There is a portion of my brain that still takes its shoes off before entering a thought.  It began many years ago when I was exposed to knowledge.  Just a little rubbed off on me and that little bit has spread slowly like a glob of ketchup on the sleeve of a white shirt.

Before I go on any further, I should mention the metal pail sitting on the floor by the edge of my desk.  It is full of metaphors.  They are in no particular order, so whenever I reach down and grab one, it is anybody’s guess if it will be appropriate or complete nonsense.   I just thought I should mention that before we get too far.

Here’s the thing, rub a Q-Tip across the bottom of your shoe and then across a glass slide.  Put the slide under your microscope and have a gander.  There is an entire universe of creepy.  Now, fast forward many years.  That ketchup stain of knowledge has spread, although just enough to be dangerous.

I tend to see the world as if it is wrapped completely in bubble wrap.  Every time someone moves, a bubble gets popped.  Each bubble is filled with pollution, either in the form of fake news, general misinformation, or propaganda of some kind.  It matters not if you have 2G or 5G, or simply gee willikers, it is going to get on you.  The 5 second rule needs to be thrown out the Microsoft window.

I’m going to change gears slightly here.  Last night I saw a TV program where Lady Gaga and Bill Gates were being interviewed at the same time, in the same room.  That, in itself should have tweaked something in me, but there was yet another part of the same program that did the tweaking.

A female UCLA professor was also giving an interview.  Today I could not tell you what she said.  I was too focused on her nose ring.

What that told me was that I was the problem.  I was the only one seeing Lady Gaga as a circus clown, and nose ring lady as a runner-up.  It was me who had stepped out of their comfort zone.  Apparently when I had moved I had broken a few of the bubble wrap bubbles.  I was contaminated with preconceived ideas and old, outdated notions.

I understand that if you want to get the widest audience possible, you put Bill Gates and Lady Gaga together, but my brain just couldn’t handle a college professor wearing a nose ring.  Where was her ketchup stain? 

The bigger question, of course, is how do we move through society while avoiding the creepy?  There appears nothing left that isn't contaminated. Not to be a negative Nelly, but AI adds an entire different set of things to avoid that we haven't even thought of yet.

Just slipping our shoes off isn't going to do it.