Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.
Quantum Mechanics: the dreams stuff is made of.
Everyone has a photographic memory. It's just some don't have any film.
Who is General Failure and why is he reading my hard drive?
I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
How do you tell when you've run out of invisible ink?
OK, so what's the speed of dark?
Corduroy pillows: They're making headlines.
All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand.
I went to the paint store to get thinner. It didn't work.
None of these are mine, but they made me laugh.
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