From Snowbird to Early Bird

 

I got lost looking for the Bermuda Triangle.  I went up to the artic and discovered I was going in circles.   I wouldn’t have made a very good explorer.   I tried experimenting with chemistry once.  My cure for hiccups had way too many side effects and it turned out that my hair growth cream actually caused hiccups.

Throughout my life I’ve never known what I wanted to be.  I have tried many, many things, but nothing seemed to fit.  I was a fireman afraid of heights, I joined search and rescue but had no sense of direction.  I tried being a factory worker but was never really happy with what I had brought in my lunch. Same old thing, every day, blah, blah, blah.

Then one day I hit upon retirement.  Eureka!  This seemed a perfect fit.  No managers, no directors, not surrounded by employees, time clocks or dress codes.  Hey!  This was amazing.  I was left to write all day, every day.  I could write stage plays, stories, both long and short.  I could dabble in poetry and maybe even start a blog.  I was suddenly surrounded by other retirees.  These were my kind of people, completely unsupervised, free to wander the golf courses, or cluster around the hostess stand.

I’m just sorry it has taken so long for me to find it.  Nobody talked about this in high school.  My guidance counselor was a failure.