Cats Don't Wear Shoes

 

The cat’s whiskers let it know if it is going to fit through the door or opening in front of him.  My whiskers are not all that helpful.  They let others know that either I over-slept or simply became too lazy to shave.  The odds of me fitting through the door are determined by other means.  Standing up, can I see my shoes?  Does the airline make me buy two seats?  Instead of my weight, does my scale read, Please, one at a time. 

Just outside of my window I see a lizard doing pushups.  Rather than take that as a hint, I will continue with this ramble about whiskers.  I’ve always found shaving to be tedious and a result of a poor human design.  Why put facial hair on humans?  Why have it eventually disappear from their head and yet continue to sprout from their nose and ears?  Really… what’s the point? 

I believe the thing that is missing here is evolution 2.0

As we evolve, there should be a physical change directly associated with our cultural advancement.  As we progress through society, so should our appearance reflect that change.  

When we left the hunting and gathering stage, we removed our boots and put on wingtips.  Leaving the industrial age we exchanged hardhats and safety glasses for fedoras and Foster Grants.  Now, being knee-deep in the information age, facial recognition is only hindered by beards and eyebrows that point North.  We should have grown out of the Z.Z. Top phase of humanity.

 

I’ll leave it at that.

 

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