Bored of Health

 

        I stood at the deli counter and ordered ½ lb. of ham, sliced thin.  The employee reached over, took two sterile gloves from a small box of sterile gloves, and put them on.  Then he proceeded to slice the ham, taking each individual slice from the slicer and stacking it onto the paper that lay on the scale.

 

          Somewhere across town, a second customer called the deli to place an order.

 

          Hearing the ringing phone, the ham slicing employee stopped, walked over and picked up the receiver and took the phone order, writing everything down with the pen laying there next to the phone.

 

          When he hung up, he walked back and continued slicing the ham.

 

          As I watched all of this, I told myself, these people must sterilize the phone and pen after each use.

 

***

 

          I do not even want to think about all of the various unclean employee fingers that have rummaged around in that box of gloves, fumbling to pull out just two. 

 

***

 

          Maybe I am just germ-a-phobic.  It is probably best just to pay less attention to the world around me and simply go willy-nilly about my day.

 

***

 

          Sorry, can’t do it.  No – really, I just tried.  I am destined to pay attention to the details.  As Monk would say, “It’s a blessing – and a curse.”

 

*** 

 

          So, did I say anything to the employee?  No, instead I stood there having an entire dialog in my head.  I would have had to explain the basic principles of sanitation, go into detail on how many people during the course of forever pick up that receiver and pen, as well as give him a refresher course on Customer Service, all the while wondering what kind of service I could expect the next time I came in.

 

***

  

          This post is an examination of my behavior, and not that of the ham-slicing employee.  It seems I will forever repeat behaviors that are not conducive to my well-being.  How to break this behavior presently eludes me, for I have an abundance of excuses for others as well as for myself.  Knowing all of this is not considered a break-through, so I am afraid our sessions must continue.  Unlike the ham, I am not cured.