Thoughts from the edge

 

There are some aspects of my life that only take place at the edge of the page.  The problem with that is that I can’t see what is happening in the center.  It feels, at times, that someone is out there changing the rules, and by the time the information gets out to the edge - all I get  to hear is the recording, “I’m sorry, our office is currently closed.  Please call back during normal business hours.”

It seems the rules should state that you put that kind of information at the beginning of the recording, and not after you’ve just had someone spend 12 minutes going through the push one for English, press 2 if you want Accounting, press 3 if you’re making changes to your swimming stroke, and 4 if you received a fine for cleaning your fish on the picnic table.

There’s a reason you are experiencing higher than normal call volumes.  You stink at Customer Service.  But that isn’t what I want to talk about.  But wait, before we leave the topic of Customer Service, would someone please explain to me why everyone in India is named Bruce, or Jill?  You’re really not fooling anyone.

Okay, getting back to my perspective from the edge of the page.  For one thing – it is quiet out here.  I don’t mind the quiet, in fact, it’s kind of nice.  And not being the main character takes all the pressure off.  There is never a need to worry if the paragraph has been properly indented, or if some plot twist suddenly throws in a fish on a picnic table.  Not my problem.

The scary part is that being out at the edge like this, it isn’t going to take much to push me over.  I mean, if I haven’t the old values to hang onto, if someone keeps changing the rules, then what am I to cling too?  The “Norm” has disappeared.  Youth and technology have taken the lead, but without anyone steering the ship. 

I’m just saying, the sign clearly states; Don’t clean your fish on the picnic table.  Reason and common sense tell you there will be consequences.  And even ignoring the consequence of a fine, think about the poor Indian family.. Bob and his wife Mary pile the kids in the car for a nice day at the lake, only to discover flies and fish guts under the nice tablecloth they’ve spread out. 

See what I did there?  I didn’t have them discover the flies and fish guts as they walked up to the table, but I had them spread out their nice tablecloth over the files and fish guts.  That’s what I mean by – changing the rules.  It’s unsettling.  It is wrong.  But that is what I am seeing out here at the edge.