Here's the thing...

 

The shoes I’ve had forever are no longer comfortable.  They are worn out to the point of getting my attention.  That’s not a good thing.  Shoes should be something you never think about.  You put them on at the beginning of the day, and at day’s end, you slip them off.  That’s it.  If there is one thing in life you are allowed to take for granted, it’s your shoes.

I’m not here, however, to discuss the transition from old shoes to new.  We’ve all been through that.  It is the point right before the switch I wish to focus on, saying good-bye to the old pair.  Think about it.  You’ve been through an awful lot together.  It’s been a relationship.  There was trust, dependability and don’t forget comfort.   Setting them out in the trash seems just so cold.  Hardly a fitting end for old friends.  And no, they are way beyond donating.  Nobody wants these things.

I do not have a photo album full of pictures showing their first steps, or seeing for the first time, their reflection in the angled floor mirror in the shoe department.  You know, I wouldn’t put it past those people to put extra padding under the carpet in shoe department.  They are trying to sell shoes.  They don’t care how they fit or what they look like, they just want their commission, so the more cushy everything feels, the more likely you’re going to pry your wallet open.

No, sorry.  Adding another layer of polish isn’t going to bring them back to life.  It’s beyond all that now.  I could, I guess, just stick them in the back of my closet instead of putting them out with the trash.  They’d be out of the way, and whenever I needed to see an old friend, there they’d be.  I could bring them out on special occasions.  Is this too weird?  Is this getting weird?  Look, I know they are just shoes but they’re not, just shoes, if you know what I mean.

Then again, maybe by wanting to hold onto these shoes, I’m subconsciously trying to hang onto my youth.  Could that be it?  Maybe I’m no different than these actors getting face-lifts, trying to keep looking young so they can get just one more job, do one more big movie.  Am I that pathetic?

No, I don’t think that’s it.  I certainly don’t wish to relive my youth.  Once was enough.  Once through high school was certainly enough.  What a joke that was.  The only education I walked away with was an in-depth knowledge of human behavior.  So called educators regurgitating bland descriptions, obscure dates and for what?  The teacher’s lounge filled with cigarette smoke while pay stubs were compared and weekend plans made.  No more than children themselves – no thank you.  Once through that was enough for a lifetime.

 

So what then?  What do I do with these?  What would be a graceful end to their time here?  Do I think there is a shoe heaven?  I don’t know.  If you follow that line of thinking, then a pair of shoes unlucky enough to be on the feet of a bank robber, would not get into heaven simply due to their association to the person wearing them?  How is that fair?  You’re saying a doctor’s shoes would be more important than a plumbers?  Maybe it’s like that kid thing…  All children automatically get into heaven, just like all pets do.  So maybe it is the same with shoes.

 

You know, I’ve seen these psychic shows, where they say loved ones are there to meet you when you get to heaven.  A sweet thought indeed, but that leaves me wondering…

What about that one shoe you see in the middle of the road?  How did they get separated?  Has the other shoe gone on without its mate?  How sad is that?

 

I don’t think I want to talk about this anymore.

 

 

 

Z. Corwin